It’s happened before and it’ll happen again. Those moments when the thought of quitting your dream takes you and feels utterly overwhelming. If you’re a fellow side-hustler or own your own business, I’m sure you can relate.
I had a moment like this recently. I woke up one morning and just thought… is it worth it? I’ve been working so hard since launching my coaching services a year and a half ago. I’ve written blogs weekly, apart from a couple of weeks where I moved house. I’ve never missed a monthly newsletter. I launched a podcast. I ‘showed up’ and talked about my services.
I even invested in a course to help me rethink my marketing and services, coming up with new, more defined packages. Somehow whilst doing all this on the side of my day-job, I’ve also managed to prioritise self-care and look after my mental health.
At the start of 2020 it felt like things were finally clicking into place. I was getting lots of amazing opportunities, I felt excited about my packages and then… well, coronavirus hit. Everything got turned upside down. The opportunities I had lined up fell away and it was hard to know what to do.
But I kept going. I continued my planned launch of my new packages, I continued to write, to release podcasts, to plan. And then opportunities slowly started picking up again. But even then… this intense exhaustion came up. Talking about coaching, ‘showing up’, it all felt too much. Returning to my day-job full time felt tempting, easy even.
“Would that really make you happy though?” Dan asked me when I told him this. “No” I said.
And then I did some thinking. I thought I’d outline the process I went through and how I’m moving on from this here, in case you’re going through something similar.
Remember why you’re doing it
This is what Dan triggered in his question to me. I know giving this up wouldn’t make me happy. I know I want to support people and even if I never get paid for it, even if I do decide to let go of the coaching dream – creating content and supporting people is something I think I’ll always do.
I know how important the work I’m doing is. I know it’s helped people, I have the evidence. I believe in what I’m doing and reconnecting with that was key.
If you’re in a similar boat, try reminding yourself why you wanted this in the first place – what is your mission? Write it down and see how it makes you feel.
Step back and look at your surroundings
Our thoughts and feelings are coloured by what’s going on around us. Taking a minute to step back and think about what else was happening was a really important part of the process. I noted the effect of coronavirus, how it’s made my resilience thinner than usual. I also spotted that I was on day 25 on my cycle, when PMS starts to take hold. This always makes me feel exhausted and less confident.
So, take a second to look up and see what’s happening around you, because there’s a high chance it’s affecting the thoughts you’re having.
Lean on your support system
A couple of days after having my “I want to quit moment” I had a group mentoring call booked in with Josephine Brooks as part of my membership with Nurture and Thrive. I used this opportunity to express how I was feeling and talk it out. We were able to come up with ideas for ‘quick wins’ that would help me feel excited about my business again, and after the call that’s exactly how I felt – excited.
Plan in a break
This is next on my to-do list. The last time I took a proper break from both my day job and Blue Jay work was around this time last year when I took a break from everything (including social media). I’m craving this kind of break again.
Because at the end of the day, this is what’s underpinning my “I want to quit” moment – tiredness. I don’t lack belief in myself, I don’t want to quit because I don’t want to do it anymore, I’m just… tired. And I know giving myself a proper break will renergise me.
If you can relate to the tired feeling, I implore you to book in a break too if it’s possible. More than a couple of days if possible, give yourself a chance to really clear your mind and fully rest. See how you feel at the end of it.
So there we go, an honest chat about something you’re not really supposed to admit to. But I believe the more we talk about these things, the more we’ll see that we’re not alone. I hope the ideas here were helpful and if you have any other thoughts on getting through the ‘I want to quit’ feeling, do share in the comments or let me know on Instagram.
I’ll be back next week to talk about small habits that lead to big changes. Until then, take care.
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