I talk about self-worth a lot, being a self-worth coach, but I know sometimes phrases like this can feel a little fluffy and intangible. It can be hard to get your head around what it actually is, and why you should care.
So let’s start with a real quick definition of self-worth: “the sense of one’s own value or worth as a person; self-esteem; self-respect.”
The reason I have such a passion in this area is because I’ve experienced the impact re-discovering my own sense of worth has had on all areas of my life. For those of you who don’t know, in my teen years I struggled with an eating disorder and my self-worth was buried under a cascade of dirt, illness and self-hate.
It took a long time to dig through that dirt, but the wonderful thing about self-worth is that it’s always there, underneath it all. No matter what you have piled on top of it, it will always be waiting for you. You just might need to do a little work to shift the dirt.
For me, re-discovering it changed everything and that’s what I want to share with you today. Here are a few ways knowing your worth can impact your life.
It provides a foundation on which to build self-belief and confidence
Without knowing your worth, self-belief and confidence can be tricky to build. I think this is where some of us fall down, searching desperately for confidence tips when really we need to be going deeper.
For me, self-worth has acted like a foundation. Once I knew where it was, and I strengthened it, I could build walls out of self-belief and a roof out of confidence. If you’re finding self-belief and confidence tricky, consider how your foundation is doing.
It helps you go for what you really want
Once you’ve built this metaphorical house of self-worth, you’re more protected. You feel braver and able to take more risks. Why? Because you know, no matter what happens, you have your house to return to. Even if you try something and fail, you’ll have an underlying quiet knowledge that this doesn’t affect your worth.
It doesn’t make going for what you want totally fear-free, but it helps you navigate the fear better. It allows you to push yourself that little bit further.
It helps you feel more fulfilled
When you’re able to go for what you really want in work and life, you can have some fun with it. Once you know your value and what you can ‘bring to the table’, you can think about how you want to use this in your life. Do you want to help others? Do you want a life with greater ease? Do you want space and time to be more creative? Do you want to make an impact?
All of this brings an incredible amount of joy and fulfillment to your life. Knowing my worth and how this shapes my purpose has given my career the most amazing direction.
It makes you more resilient
Again, this comes back to those strong foundations. There are things in life we simply cannot control. And just like storms, these events can tear our house apart. But if you have strong foundations… you can re-build.
Having a solid sense of worth doesn’t stop the storms from happening, but it helps you feel less floored by them, because you know you have the resilience to come back from it.
It improves your relationships
When you know your worth, you are more able to ask for what you need. Both in life and in relationships. For me this came up as a past relationship was heading to an end. Part of me wanted to hold on and try to make it work, but I knew my worth and that I didn’t deserve to feel the way I was feeling anymore. I knew I wasn’t who he wanted and I knew that deep down, our values differed too much. It hurt to walk away, but it reminded me I was a whole person whether I’m in or out of a relationship.
Since then I’ve been able to recognise better when partners are right or wrong for me. And now I’m in another relationship, I can communicate better what I need because I know I’m worth it.
I hope after reading this you can understand why it’s a subject I hold close to my heart and why I want to support others in this area. I’m actually in the midst of re-jigging my coaching packages to ensure what I can offer you in terms of self-worth discovery, and self-belief and confidence building is right.
I talked recently on IGTV about how self-care fits in with all of this, so definitely have a watch of that to learn more. As I write this I’m feeling incredibly grateful and excited that all things self-worth are falling into place in my mind and how this is going to affect my coaching work.
If you want to be the first to know about the new packages, make sure you subscribe to my monthly newsletter as this is where I’ll share the news first (and offer an introductory subscriber discount).
I’ll be back next week with a podcast about building resilience and a blog with some pointers on what to do when you feel stuck. Until then, take care.
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